Friday, February 4, 2011

Fear...The Living Death

Fear...living in it makes you paralyzed. There are many "phobia" out there that you can associate many fears (ex. arachnophobia). When people are confronted with their fears, they usually are frozen and paralyzed mentally by it. I call fear the "living death" because once you are consumed by it, you might as well be dead. Hellraiser got it right when they said "Fear is the mindkiller". When you are paralyzed in fear, do you do anything helpful for society? Do you contribute anything meaningful when you are afraid? The answer is No!

Ever confront something and tell yourself "I hope somebody takes care of this, because I can't do it." Do you sit back and hope that someone or some law comes to the rescue? In these moments, you are paralyzed with fear. At these moments, you no longer contribute to anything good. You just sit there, hoping for some saviour-like thing to come around so the responsibility is no longer yours. This has happened to all of us. As children, we hope the adults take care of it. As adults, we hope the police or our government takes care of it. What happens when you can no longer rely on any of them? We've seen some bad parents, bad police, AND bad politicians. I'm not saying they are all bad, but if you know some bad apples are in the bunch, can you truly trust them? We put too much faith in others, and not enough in ourselves. There is only one person who can make your life better...YOURSELF.

This country was founded on courage and bravery. 235 years later, we're surrounded by fear. So many rules and regulations are out there, it's destroyed common sense. Over 100 years ago, it was very common for people to carry around guns everywhere they went. Today, very few even own a gun. Why is that? Simple...we put all our faith in public civil servants to rescue us when we are in danger. Why learn how to save yourself when you can have others do it for you? This is not a smarter way to do things. This is a lazy way to do things. If someone holds you at gun point, do you wait til the police arrive, or do you defend yourself? Bullies prey on the weak...so why do we allow ourselves to believe that we are weak? Thugs know for the most part that you have no protection, so they will take advantage and take from you every chance they get.

Do you want to live a life of where you get bullied around? There is a commercial on Cartoon Network that talks about bullying. One kid bullies another kid, while another just watches. How many were in the wrong? If you guessed all 3, you are right! First, bullying is wrong. We all know that. Second, the kid being bullied is in the wrong. Why let some person push you around? They should learn how to defend themselves. Their parents should allow room for success in order to make this kid stronger physically and mentally. Third, the kid who just watches is even more wrong than the other two. First they watch the bully, then watch the victim being bullied. What does this person do? NOTHING!

We should take this example and learn from it. If you sit and watch it happen while doing nothing, you are not doing anything to make society or your own life better. Anyone can sit here and tell you "that is wrong", but how many did something about it? This 3rd person is in the most wrong because they could have stood up and stopped the bully from pursuing his lust for power. With this 3rd person doing nothing, it continues the cycle of lusting for power, enhancing the power and level of greed.

What would happen if the 3rd person stood up and did something about it. Better yet, what if both the 2nd and 3rd person stood up and took the bully on? First it's 2 vs 1. The odds are in favor of the 2 kids. Second, it would show that the power the bully wants to use is no longer applicable in this situation. Third, it would show that anytime someone wants to be a tough guy, they will face opposition every time. The bully would then be all alone, forcing that person to look at what they've done. It wouldn't be the "nerd" who faces isolation, but the bully. No one wants to be the nerd. This would reverse the role, making people not want to be a bully.

If we can get our kids to be stronger, this would help eliminate a lot of problems in today's society. The problem is that parents are teaching their kids to rely on others instead of themselves. Religion, school, workplace...all of these things help contribute to this. They teach us that others will save us. With religion, it's the God you worship. With school, it's the police or teachers that protect you from harm. With the workplace, it's the managment that will keep you safe. These everyday things teach us that you and I are powerless. That couldn't be further from the truth.

So what would I suggest to help lead a beter society? For starters, teach each other to be less dependent on other people. People tend to let others down. What makes you think that the police, teachers, managers, and others like them would never fail you? They are human too. If you want to succeed, YOU have to choose to succeed. Not your parents, not your friends, not your co-workers, nobody. YOU control your own destiny. YOU can choose to be a doormat, to live in fear, to hide from danger. But YOU can also choose to be strong, courageous, educated, no longer living in fear. Imagine for one minute that you had no fear. What could stop you? The answer is nothing! Nothing could stop you from being who you truly want to be. Why listen to others that make you afraid? All they are doing is passing their insecurities onto you. Making you fear what they fear. I say enough of that!

I used to have a fear of being able to speak to people. For those that know me on a personal or professional level, you would never have thought it. But it is true. I used to be very shy. I would be afraid of offending people, of going against the status quo, of being honest even though I disagreed with people. It made me a doormat. I was scared of what people thought of me. I was making no positive addition to society or even myself. Then one day, my family moved me from Pittsburgh to Philadelphia. At first, I was still shy. I felt alone, isolated, like as though no one could ever like me. I then started to realize that if I never speak, if I never open myself up, I would be alone for my whole life. I started to speak more, voice my opinions, even say things that not everyone agreed with. Oddly enough, people enjoyed talking to me. So I opened myself up more to others. I found people thought I was smart, funny, and actually enjoyed having conversations with me. They found that my point of view was either something they found very interesting, or it was something they were afraid to say and agreed with me. This helped created who I am today...a fearless, rebellious, open-minded, and well educated person.

Now imagine if I never did that. I would have never started this blog. I would have never become a lead technician at my job. I would have never had sex, let alone have children. I would have never found the joys and discomforts of being around people. That fear would have paralyzed my being and never help create who I am today. Living in fear is wrong. It's so wrong, that it ruins your life. It keeps you sheltered and scared. It keeps you from learning more about the world. Keeps you away from the truth, no matter how scary or painful it is. If you believe in God or some other deity, do you think they would want you to love them or fear them? You can't love something that you fear. You could only love by words, not with meaning when you fear someone who love. It becomes a lie. Last time I checked, religions frown upon lying.

Be the person you're suppose to be. Eliminate the fear and you'll find that the person you really are is beautiful, both inside and out.

1 comment:

  1. Very true. Fear is very crippling to a person. As hard as it is to make that first step, you have to do it.

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